Read on to learn what causes the mother wound and father wound, the symptoms of each type of wound, and how to best care for yourself as an adult if you have one. The Mother Wound vs. the Father Wound Fathers play an important role in the development of children. God designed it that way through the duality of creation. They play a greater role than to fulfill the “wait until your father comes home” threat. I believe the #metoo campaign of violence and harassment against women is the direct result of a manifestation of the father wound in men. I grew up in a fatherless home. I didn’t have a male role model (uncle, coach, etc). I was always told I would grow up to be on drugs, or in prison, or gay, or a wife beater, that I would drop out of school and never have a job, that I would be a drain on society etc. I am none of them. As long as you believe the narrative in your mind that you are not good enough for your father, you will never heal.

Having an emotionally absent father can make you fear committing in adult relationships . You may prefer to keep your distance from people instead of getting too close because you don’t want to be hurt. 4. Shallow relationships After asking these questions, take a long pause and observe what you are sensing or feeling in your body, says Parker. Then journal about the emotions, thoughts, and feelings that have surfaced, preferably in nature or a serene environment, she suggests. 2. Set Up Therapy and BoundariesI know how this pain feels. I’ve been there, and at times I still feel the pain, like an amputee that feels phantom pains after a limb is removed. I’ve never really had a good relationship with my dad, and even at times not one at all. My prayer is that what lies below will give you some encouragement, and set your heart on a path of healing. Related: Best 18 Self Compassion Journal Prompts (+FREE Worksheets) #2. Challenge Negative Messages

My prayer for each of you is that if the father wound has been inflicted upon your heart, that you will begin to heal today. Ladies, you are beautiful, smart, and worthy of respect from men, and you are worthy of respect from yourself. Men, you are good enough, you are strong and wise and brave. Go forward towards healing; go forward towards the Father’s heart, so you can share His story…better. What is the father wound? Every person has a deep longing in their heart to hear from their father the same words Christ heard from His Father, “This is my beloved Son (or daughter), in whom I am well-pleased” (Matt 3:17; 17:5). It is a deep longing to know we have pleased our father. Working with a therapist can help you to heal from trauma and develop healthier ways of coping with the damage from a father wound. A therapist can offer guidance and new insights that help you to change unhealthy patterns of behavior and ways of thinking. 5. Talk with your father If you have a father wound, you may find that your “subconscious wants to prove to Dad that ‘I am deserving of love,’” says Parker. The expert says that some adults with a father wound from childhood “become overachievers because they may feel internally that Dad needs to see that they have value.”Any parental figure can cause a mother or father wound due to not showing love, being absent, or not being supportive of their child,” says Parker. “I have seen cases where you have a narcissistic parent and the other parent is very passive. This also causes the mother or father wound.” When you forgive your father for his negligence, abuse, abandonment, or any other wound he created, you are exemplifying the God’s forgiveness to us.